Don't slay your dragons. Tame them. A Badass Man's guide to fear.

This Halloween week, we're all thinking about monsters. But the scariest monsters aren't under your bed; they live in your head. The fear of failure. The fear of rejection. The fear of not being good enough.

We're taught to slay these dragons—to fight them, to ignore them, to push them down. But what if that's the wrong approach? What if our fear isn't an enemy to be destroyed, but a signal to be understood?

Psychological fear is just a messy, loud, often inaccurate compass pointing directly at something you care about.

• That fear of failing at a new career? It’s a signal that you deeply value growth and success.

• That fear of rejection? It’s a signal that you deeply value connection.

• That fear of speaking up? It’s a signal that you deeply value being seen and having an impact.

Instead of slaying your dragons, learn to tame them with these three steps:

1. Name it (take away its power): A nameless dread is a terrifying monster. But a named fear—"I am specifically afraid of looking foolish in this meeting"—is just a problem. And problems can be solved.

2. Listen to it (find the message): Ask your fear, "What are you trying to protect?" Its intention is always to keep you safe. Acknowledge that good intention, even if its advice (to hide, to run) is terrible. This separates the signal from the noise.

3. Use its fire (fear as fuel): The adrenaline and energy that come with fear are powerful. Instead of letting it paralyze you, channel it into focused action. Use it to prepare, to practice, to take that one small step forward. Courage is not the absence of fear; it is the mastery of it.
   

Your fears don't have to be your cages; they can be your catalysts. Remember...

Badasses aren't born, they're built. So let's get to work.

In Chapter 8 of Be a Badass Man, you’ll find step-by-step exercises to turn fear from a master into a messenger. Your courage is waiting.