Stop being a 'nice guy'. Start being a 'good man'.

Let's name a painful truth: the man who calls himself a "Nice Guy" is often anything but. He performs kindness as a transaction. He puts "nice" coins into the machine, expecting sex, attention, or validation to come out. When it doesn't, he gets angry, resentful, and complains about the "friend zone."

This isn't niceness. It's a covert contract. It's a manipulation tactic, however unconscious. The "Nice Guy" isn't actually kind; he's just afraid of conflict and terrified of rejection, so he uses passive aggression and feigned kindness as his weapons. It is fundamentally dishonest.

A Good Man is different.

• A Good Man is kind because it is his character, not his strategy. He doesn't expect a reward for basic human decency.

• A Good Man has clear intent. He doesn't hide his romantic interest behind a mask of friendship. He respectfully makes his intentions known, and he can handle a "no" with grace because his self-worth isn't on the line.

• A Good Man has boundaries. He can be kind and supportive without becoming a doormat. He can say "no" when necessary.

The "Nice Guy" fears being disliked. The Good Man is more concerned with being respected, first by himself and then by others. One is a performance rooted in fear; the other is an identity rooted in integrity.

Stop performing niceness. Start embodying goodness. The world is full of Nice Guys. It is desperately in need of Good Men.

Badasses aren't born, they're built. So let's get to work.

From “Nice Guy” patterns to grounded confidence. Be a Badass Man shows the way.